Stump the Pastor

What I wanted to tell you on Sunday morning, but you were sleeping.



John Stange recommends using Google's Photo Software to organize your photos.

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

I haven't forgotten


Hello everyone. Just a quick message to let you know that I haven't forgotten you, nor have I fallen off the face of the planet. I am in the midst of our summer camping season at PMBC which means I have next to no time to spend in front of my computer. I will post regularly again for a few days sometime around July 18th (my birthday). After that, it will most likely be the third week of August before posts become regular.

Hope your summer is going well.

Monday, June 20, 2005

Is it worth it?

One of the greatest joys for average golfers such as myself is to find a few lost golf balls while you're on the course. Usually, I'm willing to scour the woodline for a minute or two if I get the chance. Some people, however, are much more committed to the process.

I went golfing with 6 friends this afternoon at the Thornhurst Country Club (which sounds rich and fancy, but it's not.....they charge $10 to play and the greens are usually mowed as high as the fairway). The eighth hole requires you to hit over a pond. Frequently, one or more of us lose a ball or two in the water before making it over. Because there hasn't been much rain lately, the pond was mostly dry so several of the guys decided to walk across it and see if they found any balls worth keeping.

In the end, they emerged having regretted their venture. To their credit, however, they did find a few lost balls, but I'm not certain it was worth it. The mud literally smelled like sewage. Pictured above, and below, is Todd Pearage soon after emerging from the pond.

Thursday, June 16, 2005

What do you see?

I found this online. Stare at the cross in the center for a little while and tell me what happens. Remember, it will only work if you're staring at the cross.

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

How not to be poor

I just returned home after speaking at a graduation dinner held at one of our sister churches. Among other things, I shared something with the graduates that was recently reported in a study done by Walter Williams.

Williams studied the major causes of poverty and he surmised four important things young people must do if they want to avoid becoming poor. Here they are:

1. Graduate from High School.
2. Be willing to work any job, even if the pay is initially lower than what you had hoped for.
3. Don't get pregnant until you're married and once you're married, stay married.
4. Avoid criminal activity.

Sound advice.

Saturday, June 11, 2005

Sunburn

Right now, as I sit at my computer (which I have missed for days), I am basking in the warm glow of a sunburn. After working outside all day in the blaring sun, my skin has turned an earthy reddish color and I feel constantly warm (and relatively uncomfortable).

Two things always happen to me when I get a sunburn, both of which drive me crazy. For whatever reason, my nose becomes a very bright shade of red, prompting comments like "Hey Rudolph," or "Wow, you look like Rudolph," or "Your red nose makes you look like Rudolph," or, "The club chalupa at Taco Bell is delicious."

The other problem is my eyes. Everything around my eyes will burn, with the exception of two circles under my eyes which strangely remain a bright shade of white. This condition tends to prompt comments like, "Hey Raccoon," or "Wow, you look like a Raccoon," or "The white circles under your eyes make you look like a Raccoon," or "A small side of nachos is a delicious addition to any Taco Bell meal."

So there you have it. I'm a raccoon faced reindeer who loves Mexican food.

Wednesday, June 08, 2005

The secret ingredient in funnel cake

Today I took my family on a trip to Knoebel's Amusement Park, which, according to the Discovery Channel is rated the #2 amusement park in the country.

I don't have time right now to list why Knoebel's is so wonderful, so let me just focus on one aspect of their greatness: ....... their food. Every kind of "fair food" worth eating can be ingested at the park. One of my favorites is the funnel cake.

While eating a funnel cake early this afternoon, I began pondering what goes into the mix and why we aren't allowed to see the cakes while they're being made.

To make a long story short, I decided to do a little snooping. To my amazement I learned that funnel cakes are nothing more than deep-fried / powdered sugared brain. There you have it.

I asked the staff at Knoebel's why their funnel cakes seemed to taste better than the other parks. They replied, "We only use the brains of really smart people."

Sunday, June 05, 2005

Sleepover

I think my oldest child, Hannah, is starting to feel a little left out. Her brothers, Jay and Daniel share a room. That being the case, Hannah is the only person in our house who doesn't share a room so she's really hoping that the new baby will be a girl.

Anyway, Hannah decided, while she's waiting for a sister, to take matters into her own hands. Last night, several hours after she went to bed, Andrea went in to check on her and discovered that her floor was covered with stuffed animals, all tucked in with individual blankets and their heads were propped up on little impromptu pillows. Pictured above is my personal favorite, Mike Wasowski from Monster's Inc.

What a fun sleepover that must have been. This afternoon before taking a nap, Hannah also decided to dress Shamu in jammies and share some "down-time" with her favorite sea creature.

If our new baby isn't a girl, I'm pretty sure Hannah is going to disown us.

Thursday, June 02, 2005

Done deal

Short post today. Just thought I should let you know that the deal is done. The van is purchased. The new van has all the bells and whistles a family hopes for when they purchase a living room on wheels.

For a while, my wife has accused me of driving the newest car and relegating her to second best. That myth has now been forever debunked. Pictured above is my happy companion standing next to the new wheels in our driveway. Even though the van is a true family vehicle, it also tends to be my wife's primary car (hence the huge smile across her face).

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Venture

I'm about to buy this. At first glance, maybe a minivan doesn't excite you and I understand, because I used to be just like you. Now, with three kids and one more on the way, a van is a necessity.

The best part is that last Friday, while bringing our current van to the dealer to see how much he would give us on a trade, the alternator stopped working. Lovely.

Many people think that minivans are boring, but I would like to contend that they are not. Let me list for you the six most exciting factors about owning a minivan.

1. You can put the noisiest or smelliest kid in the far back (which is an additional 5-6 feet further away than in a standard car).

2. Minivans have a pocket or pouch for everything.

3. If I ever buy a canoe, the handy roof-rack will allow me to transport it to the river. (I'm hesitant to try that with the Miata).

4. The new hatch-back comes with 14% more hatch.

5. State Troopers rarely pull over a mini-van. (When we're driving too fast, they mistakenly assume we're responsible drivers who might just be having an off moment.)

6. This new van comes with rear air-conditioning (which is much better than the kind of rear air that used to fill our old van.)

So there you have it. I'm making a wise purchase.